I AM CHALLENGE DAY FOURTEEN

I AM

SAVED by GRACE

My God is a jealous God.  His relentless pursuit of me and YOU is astounding. His wish is that not one of us perish. That we would all reign in Heaven with Him. That we would all come home...I am thankful for His boundless love.

His grace, too, is boundless. There is nothing that grace won't cover for those who are humble and repent. What Jesus did for me on that cross in beyond comprehension...its unfathomable.

Reemember freedom comes by the Blood of the Lamb AND by the Word of our Testimony. Even though I believed this and knew I had recieved his full forgiveness, which brought me salvation... 

I still held onto some of my sin. 

I didn't commit these sins any longer, but I kept them a secret, from everyone. Its private right? Between me and God, right?

Wrong.

I was pretending to be whole, while I was only sharing the best parts of my journey, picking and choosing the highlights to share, keeping the dirty secrets hidden...because, honestly, I wanted others to approve. 

But then...His pursuit of me became intense...

Suttle things began to take place that threatened my secrets being revelead and then I stumbled upon Matthew 10:33

I say stumbled, because I avoided the corrective verses in the BIble..those were for someone else...I was already saved. (Yes, I used to think this way)

Revelation!

It was then I realized what I had done. I had denied what He had done for me...

I had been a christian for nearly17 years and the entire time I was keeping my sin a secret and denying the full testimony of Jesus...

When I realized what I had done, my heart shattered. 

Repentance came like a flood and His grace covered me. I spent more and more time seeking the Lord. Praying and listening...for weeks...until I knew who who He was and trusted Him to walk beside me as I revealed my secrets. 

His grace was sufficient. 

My masks have been removed!

I want to share with you something I wrote during this time of being revealed at a womens summit. I was asked to give my testimony and given only 1 minute to share...I thought to myself...are they kidding? I politely asked for more time and their response - they gave me 3 minutes. 

I thought to myself, there is no way I can bring what the Lord is calling me to reveal in 3 minutes...But being obedient, I went to prayer and as He always does, the Holy Spirit led me to create a unique way to tell part of my story, this is my first testimony, while bold...it was still safe. 

Have you ever heard of a spoken word?

spoken word

In a basic sense, SPOKEN WORD is a rhythmic poetry. It is performed enthusiastically (be it vibrant or emotional), rather than just read plainly. Like other art forms, it is a form of self-expression, and can be used as therapy for the artist and the listener.

Here is my first Spoken Word:

I’m hear to tell you my story…

But it’s not to raise me up

Its to bring Him glory

So listen up friends

I gotta make it fast

cause I’ve only got a minute

to talk about my past

Let me give fair warning…

its gonna be a ride

This aint no fairy tale.

No longer will I hide

Let me start where it ended,

          the place that I died.   
         

I stood up before a crowd
and declared with a shout

The inheritance is mine

I am taking my rightful place

As the bride right here, right now 

I served notice to the enemy

unveiled the mask that hid me

I found courage to take a stand.

And when I did…

The Lord took my hand

I understand full well

This is an assignment 

He’s perfected

To Speak Life & Live

To those who have been rejected

To heal the broken hearted

The ones behind the veil

where guilt shame and condemnation

have been their prison cell

I know who they are

I understand their pain

I've walked their walk

The world I knew as a girl

Was darkness and despair

Unspeakable abuse, lies, torment

No...life wasn't fair

See I walked this earth stuck

behind a mask of imperfection

on the outside I pretended
to be the perfect born again Christian
but inside I was still broken, 
my life played out like a cheap charade
deep dark secrets left unspoken 


Then one day God crashed in
 revealing my true identity

It came as a voice from the grave  

and brought a revelation

 with just four little words

about my creation

snapped me into reality

with a clear revelation.

--

You Were Never Wanted

--

These words were spoken

Into my wounded heart  & soul

That was already broken

It was her last confession

-My first reaction –

was to tighten the mask…

the one I'd always worn

so no one would ask

All the lies and deception

before my conception

I finally had the answer

To all the rejection 

The journey from that day

to this place that I stand

is now I know 

--

Who I am.

-- 

I know the truth of my existence

I know why I was born

No longer do I have an identity crisis

Love came in, and rescued me

Took away the pain

To reveal my true identity

Though I was despised for living

I am loved in the heavenly

HIs Word came alive in Jeremiah one five

He knew me  -before- He formed me

He called me by name

He chose me, raised me,

and now here I stand

For such a time as this...